I’ve been having problems with my laptop for the past couple of weeks with a touch pad and cursor that jumps around, screens that disappear and reappear, and the loss of whatever it is I’m trying to write. This weekend my laptop makes a trip to the Apple Genius Bar to get fixed with the hope that the problem they detected and fixing, will heal my computer (and thus my frustration). So when I saw this meme, I had to smile because it’s so true in just about everything we do in life. Healing, be it physical, emotional, mental, or spiritual, is rarely linear, and the more complicated the problem, the more bumps along the way. Case in point – my husband had a liver transplant over a year ago and it was textbook perfect. He got home in 11 days and felt great, until he started to run a fever and a virus called CMV was detected. Back in the hospital he went and was there for almost two weeks trying to get this under control. He came home, and was good for a couple more weeks until he relapsed with the virus and was again back in the hospital. Today he’s healthy, but the past year has had more than its share of twists and turns.
I see this often with my clients, especially those dealing with major issues. Setbacks, or a bumps in the road, are hard to understand and demoralizing at times, but often very important to healing and to be expected. Setbacks can teach us is what’s working and what is not working in therapy. Sometimes the client can become too comfortable with the road we’re on and/or has not fully made the changes in life that we’ve been talking about. Sometimes a setback will identify new triggers that need to be worked on. A setback in this manner can be a wake-up call that something has to change.
Setbacks can also be blessings, especially for those who have a difficult time letting go or allowing others to help. When my husband was in the hospital for the second and then third time, I realized that I could not be with him everyday and juggle everything else in my life without help. I finally allowed people to help me and reaped the blessings as a result. In this manner, a setback teaches us about ourselves as we often have to dig deeper within or step outside of our little bubble we live in.
If you’re going through a rough period in your life and feel like your life is continually filled with setbacks or roadblocks, I can help. Healing is not linear, but healing can happen. Give me a call at 720-707-9119 and we’ll start the process. Jane McGill, MA, LPCC, NCC, Clinical Counseling.